Everybody does it, but nobody likes to admit it
When we're first dating someone, we all like to believe that our significant other just doesn't have certain bodily functions. And we make every effort to cover up the fact that we do.
Using the bathroom, burping and having flatuence are all of our hidden secrets. We will hold it in to the point of pain. Like a woman teetering on a pair of very uncomfortable high-heeled shoes, we suck it up, just to impress our new mate. It's especially tough for women. Although men are believed to be smelly and burpy, women are supposed to be clean and dainty. And letting one rip while watching a movie at home doesn't exactly perpetuate that stereotype.
But later in the relationship, something changes. You'll reach a point when you're absolutely comfortable with the other person, and before you know it, something will slip out. Your first thought may be mortification, but after that, relief settles in because now you know that your sweetheart likes you no matter what.
Discussing this reminds me of an episode of "How I Met Your Mother," which, by the way, is hilarious. In this particular episode, Lily and Marshall (who I think are engaged, but may have just been dating for a really long time), get stuck in a bathroom together. Eventually, Lily has to go to the bathroom, but she refuses to pee in front of Marshall. It's the one last piece of mystery in the relationship, she says. She just CAN'T do it. But eventually the urge to pee is too great, and she uses the bathroom (as long as Marshall stands in the bathtub behind the shower curtain).
I, personally, have never used the bathroom in front of a significant other or even used the bathroom with the door open. I already have a complex about him being able hear me do my business, so that's just not going to happen. Some things just need to remain private. However, in terms of other bodily functions, I think it's great when you can finally relax and do those things around your guy (or gal).
What do you think? Should people hide their bodily functions forever or does a relationship reach a point, when you no longer have to pretend that these things don't happen? How long does it usually take? Weeks, months, years? Has the revelation of these functions too soon resulted in a break-up (or no subsequent date)?
Using the bathroom, burping and having flatuence are all of our hidden secrets. We will hold it in to the point of pain. Like a woman teetering on a pair of very uncomfortable high-heeled shoes, we suck it up, just to impress our new mate. It's especially tough for women. Although men are believed to be smelly and burpy, women are supposed to be clean and dainty. And letting one rip while watching a movie at home doesn't exactly perpetuate that stereotype.
But later in the relationship, something changes. You'll reach a point when you're absolutely comfortable with the other person, and before you know it, something will slip out. Your first thought may be mortification, but after that, relief settles in because now you know that your sweetheart likes you no matter what.
Discussing this reminds me of an episode of "How I Met Your Mother," which, by the way, is hilarious. In this particular episode, Lily and Marshall (who I think are engaged, but may have just been dating for a really long time), get stuck in a bathroom together. Eventually, Lily has to go to the bathroom, but she refuses to pee in front of Marshall. It's the one last piece of mystery in the relationship, she says. She just CAN'T do it. But eventually the urge to pee is too great, and she uses the bathroom (as long as Marshall stands in the bathtub behind the shower curtain).
I, personally, have never used the bathroom in front of a significant other or even used the bathroom with the door open. I already have a complex about him being able hear me do my business, so that's just not going to happen. Some things just need to remain private. However, in terms of other bodily functions, I think it's great when you can finally relax and do those things around your guy (or gal).
What do you think? Should people hide their bodily functions forever or does a relationship reach a point, when you no longer have to pretend that these things don't happen? How long does it usually take? Weeks, months, years? Has the revelation of these functions too soon resulted in a break-up (or no subsequent date)?
posted by Anonymous at 10:25 AM
9 Comments:
Hahaha...in June, my BF and I will be together for three years...and we still hide all this stuff! I even turn on the sink while I am in the bathroom if he is nearby so he doesn't hear any of the going-ons. While he doesn't go to those lengths, he still won't do certain things if I am close.
I definitely think that when it comes to using bathrooms for bodily functions, couples should let the mystery remain. I would never want my BF in there while I am using it...and vice versa. I don't think it brings closeness, I think it brings too-much-information.
I've been with my BF for over six years, and I STILL will not use the restroom in front of him. I don't care how long we have been together, there are certain things that are just off limits!
goings-on?
It depends on how "close" the two of you are. I don't think it's such a "big deal" being in the same room while either one of you are taking care of business....it's a natural human occurence. Get over it !!
Anon #1 — Going-on's was my polite way of using the bathroom. I try to stay away from being too graphic.
Anon #2 — I think it takes a special kind of closeness to use the bathroom with your boyfriend/girlfriend present, but if you don't, I'm not sure it's necessarily something you "get over." I think it's good to leave a little mystery in this situation.
Most homes have two bathrooms so this isn't really an issue to begin with. If you are close enough to be "intimate" why is this such a big deal compared to that?? It just depends on the couple.
Looks like the folks at your TV show borrowed from "Mad About You". The husband and wife got locked into a bathroom for hours and solved the problem the same way.
I don't think it was necessarily an original idea to start with, anyway. But I would have made him sing or hum while in the shower too, lol.
I agree ...Get over it !! It's not the end of the world.
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