Weepy men
Roxy pointed out last week that men just can't seem to stand seeing women cry. But can we bear to see men cry?
Traditionally, men always have been perceived as the stronger sex. They were raised to be tough, show no emotion and never, under any circumstance, cry. Crying was a sign of weakness. Crying was, for lack of a better word, girly.
I sense a new generation of men are upon us, though. Back in college, my friend and I were talking about how our then-boyfriends sure liked sharing their emotions. They often got teary and passionate when talking about their — gasp! — feelings. It was almost to a point where it made us, the "emotional females," uncomfortable to be around them.
Although we women have bemoaned for ages that men don't talk about their feelings with us, I'm not sure we're ready to handle it. Can we stand to see our man cry over a bad day, disappointment or loss? Men have come to accept this from women, but I don't think we've been able to accept this from men. We want someone who will stay strong for us -- someone who is our rock to lean on, and, for the most part, a whimpering man just won't cut it.
For me, seeing as how I'm often prone to tears myself, I can't help but allow some teary eyes on my own man's side. Emotions shouldn't be bottled up, but they don't need to flow like waterfalls either.
Ladies, what do you think about men who cry? Would you date a man who cried, or would you trade him in for someone who never shed a tear? Men, do you ever feel crying is necessary. Do you think women are intolerant of men crying?
Traditionally, men always have been perceived as the stronger sex. They were raised to be tough, show no emotion and never, under any circumstance, cry. Crying was a sign of weakness. Crying was, for lack of a better word, girly.
I sense a new generation of men are upon us, though. Back in college, my friend and I were talking about how our then-boyfriends sure liked sharing their emotions. They often got teary and passionate when talking about their — gasp! — feelings. It was almost to a point where it made us, the "emotional females," uncomfortable to be around them.
Although we women have bemoaned for ages that men don't talk about their feelings with us, I'm not sure we're ready to handle it. Can we stand to see our man cry over a bad day, disappointment or loss? Men have come to accept this from women, but I don't think we've been able to accept this from men. We want someone who will stay strong for us -- someone who is our rock to lean on, and, for the most part, a whimpering man just won't cut it.
For me, seeing as how I'm often prone to tears myself, I can't help but allow some teary eyes on my own man's side. Emotions shouldn't be bottled up, but they don't need to flow like waterfalls either.
Ladies, what do you think about men who cry? Would you date a man who cried, or would you trade him in for someone who never shed a tear? Men, do you ever feel crying is necessary. Do you think women are intolerant of men crying?
7 Comments:
I could never be with a guy who couldn't express his emotions, and if it came out through crying I wouldn't hold it against him. I don't know as I could handle someone who cried all the time, simply because I'm not that kind of girl!
i would love to date a guy who was able to express his emotions!!! i seem to have run across so many guys that are so closed off and afraid to show their emotions, that i look like the major basketcase because i cry too much!!
Daddy drinks because Mommy Cries...
I think I get just as uncomfortable when my boyfriend cries as he does when i do. Other than when the tears are flowing though, we're both very good and comfortable with expressing emotion.
I don't know....a tear here and there is okay, but I definitely couldn't handle a guy who cried as much as I did....if I wanted that, I would be in a relationship with a woman!! : )
It's great if a guy has the ability to cry, but someone in the relationship needs to be able to hold it together, and for the most part, that's not the woman!! : )
so, r, there is a double standard
I feel amazingly bad when I break down into tears around my boyfriend, and part of that is that I've only ever seen him upset once. He's not the type to cry, but I liked being concerned about him when he was upset, and I liked just sitting with him and wanting nothing more than to make his hurt go away.
I guess that's not much about crying, but it's good to show weakness every once and a while!
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